The Law of the Playground
the pupil report of
F F
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As I recall we said the naughty version but knowing it was naughty, shiftily flubbed the nigger bit, thus:
Eenie Meenie Minee Moe,
Catch a nngh-nngh by his toe.

The odd thing was, we (or perhaps it was just me) never actually knew what the original offending word that had to be flubbed was. This led to additional cover-ups just in case other words in the rhyme were naughty also, hence:
If he hoo-hars, let him go.
By the time we'd finished self-editing, we sounded like a bunch of West Country Joeys.
approved Oct 19 2004, submitted Oct 18 2004 by F F
If a boy asks to borrow your pencil sharpener, on no account give it to him, it means you want to have sex with him.
Conversely, never borrow a pencil off a boy, as this also means you want to have sex with him. A rubber is alright, as long as it is scented. But scented rubbers are gay, so it's not alright, because that means you want to have sex with him.
approved Jul 12 2004, submitted Dec 9 2003 by F F
This story contains the words "bucolic" and "boob-pinching" and caused the PL team to go for a little lie down. (Not with each other, dont get funny.)

Sergeant Major was a game played by a lot of girls behind a garden shed in our bucolic playground in primary school. My friend, who invented the game, would always be the Sergeant Major, and another girl would be her Second-in-Command. Mostly the Second-in-Command would be played by a nice, docile girl who was kind to us, but occasionally the School Bully would take that role, which would add an extra frisson to the proceedings. The game was very simple and involved the Sergeant Major lining up the other girls against the shed and giving out small but curiously disturbing punishments such as boob-pinching and chinese burns if we didnt stand up straight enough. It usually lasted all lunchtime because of our lax posture. Despite the oddness this was one of our favourite games. My friend who played the Sergeant Major also instigated Lesbian Day every other Friday.
approved Jul 10 2003, submitted Jul 7 2003 by F F