The Law of the Playground
the pupil report of
Matd
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Two kids sit at their table, one kid jumps out of his chair and shouts "UPPA" in a high pitched voice, the other kid simply says "dine" in a low voice. Can, and did, culminate with a different child shouting "DIE YOU OLD PISSRUG BITCH" at the top of his voice. The piss-rug combination was insurmountable. She left and died.
approved Nov 24 2002, submitted Nov 24 2002 by Matd
Game named quite obviously after the gayest film of all time. When the top gun craze hit these shores, the playground variant involved running around with arms outstretched to form "wings" and their thumbs sticking out to form deadly guns. To lock on to your quandary, you had to make a series of beeps. Once you were making a constant lock tone, you could fire your missile. The only option left to your enemy would be to apply their air brakes, which they did by turning their thumbs upward. You missiles would then sail harmlessly by. Thus, no-one ever got hit by the missiles, and the game degraded into physical attacks on the first person to rely on "air brakes".
approved Nov 24 2002, submitted Nov 24 2002 by Matd
Ashley had a misjudged belief that he could walk on water. We enjoyed many happy breaktimes watching his christ-like attempts to cross the pond, or "the scourge of all human nature" as he called it. It really makes you wonder, it really does.
approved Nov 24 2002, submitted Nov 24 2002 by Matd
A strange but comical craze that caught on for two people and two people alone at my junior school. They decided it was acceptable to run around the playground at break time while singing "Operation Sex" to the theme of "Catch The Pigeon." At regular intervals, they would jump and thrust into mid air at some bemused and scared girls. Although high profile beatings were administered weekly to the odd pair, Operation Sex continued for three years. Then, as suddenly as it started, Operation Sex ended. Was it was deemed a success on debriefing? I wonder.
approved Nov 24 2002, submitted Nov 24 2002 by Matd