The Law of the Playground
the pupil report of
stickle brick
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One boy at our school was deemed to be so much of a der-brain that he actually beamed rays of pure der, like a lighthouse.

Deciding that "Der-Ray Flasher" sounded like the name of a country and western singer, we wrote his eponymous debut song. Well, I say a song, but it was more along the lines of pretending to play the banjo and singing "I'm Der-Ray Flasher" in cod-American twang.
approved Mar 1 2006, submitted Oct 6 2005 by stickle brick
At our school the song was the same, except the gigantic banana was 'all chopped up in pieces', and the 'spaghetti meatballs' were generally considered to be breasts. The wild size/texture/immersion in sauce disparity between meatballs and bosoms wasn't the point.
We were singing about chopped-up winkles and little brown boobs, and that's all that matters.
approved Apr 28 2005, submitted Apr 25 2005 by stickle brick
A variation on the normal game of tig. The aim was the same, except you had to play it with your coat over your head, peering down one of the arms, which ostensibly looked like you had an aardvark's snout. What we actually looked like was a bunch of kids running about with coats on our heads.
approved Feb 9 2005, submitted Oct 30 2004 by stickle brick