The Law of the Playground
the pupil report of
Ginger Snaps
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I am the most pathetic bully ever. All I did was steal one epaulette off her winter coat and hide it in the pocket. And call her 'Susie'.
approved Nov 4 2003, submitted Nov 3 2003 by Ginger Snaps
An odd game. Involved walking around the playground on the lines - those painted to represent the netball court, football pitch, etc. - without bumping into anyone else. If a bump occured the two bumpees must sing the chorus of Diana Ross' most joyous hit single.
approved Oct 23 2003, submitted Oct 9 2003 by Ginger Snaps
In Coventry, children were too poor to call it British Bulldog and had to invent their own name for it. 'Crop the wanker' was cheerily shouted across the Coundon area as little children's kneecaps were kicked in by 15 bigger boys.

Hurray! We've snuck British Bulldog in, under the wire. Phil will be FURIOUS!-The other Eds.
approved Oct 3 2003, submitted Oct 3 2003 by Ginger Snaps
I'm sorry, and I know it's not my place, but this is clearly bullshit of the highest order... Surely...
Perhaps you're right, Ginger Snaps. We do turn down a lot of entries on the grounds of unmitigated bullshit, or at least put a note on saying "here may be bullshits", but this may have gotten through. We'll leave it in, but thanks for your comment. - Log
approved Oct 2 2003, submitted Oct 2 2003 by Ginger Snaps
Kiki (dog) and Miquet (cat) in the 'French for Today' books appeared to say nothing but 'Zut' when they failed to catch each other, or mice, or when they fell off a chair.
approved Sep 23 2003, submitted Sep 23 2003 by Ginger Snaps
Kann Ich bitte das Brot haben mein Stabhausrecke is hungrich...
Can I have the bread please, my stick insect is hungry

Another triumph of vocab over use
approved Sep 11 2003, submitted Sep 9 2003 by Ginger Snaps
Jennifer (never Jenny, twat) Campbell looked like a frog. So we made up an entire alphabet in her language, called Fraagian, obviously, and sent secret notes to each other in it. Bizarrely, we never used it to be mean to her or about her. But Niki Earp claimed to be completely fluent in it and even tried to speak it. We fell out in third year...bitch...
approved Feb 6 2003, submitted Dec 30 2002 by Ginger Snaps
A Midlands thing I think. Stands for "If Destroyed Still True". When you carve "Dan is gay" into his desk and follow it with this acronym, even if Dan spends 10 minutes scratching it out it is STILL TRUE.
You can also inscribe INDST so even if it is NOT destroyed it is STILL TRUE.
A second IDST can also protect the first IDST, in case someone destroys the IDST first, rendering the actual message destroyable. But that could result in an endless chain of IDSTs, which would be lunacy.
approved Jan 31 2003, submitted Dec 24 2002 by Ginger Snaps