The Law of the Playground
the pupil report of
Daniel Buchan
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Pretending to wank followed by flicking the wrist, and the imaginary ejaculate, to one side. As you do this, say "oops!", as though ejaculating is the last thing on your mind when you're having a wank. The first time the "oops" variant was used was in a PE lesson. The bollockings and detentions lent it such bonus kudos that it caught on very quickly.
approved Nov 24 2002, submitted Nov 24 2002 by Daniel Buchan
the typewriter Large kid pins down smaller kid and, in particular, pins the small kid's arms to the floor with his knees. Once in place the large kid stabs brutally on the chest of the small kid with his index fingers, as though "typing". Ever so often the larger kid could be heard to shout 'ting', and then slap the side of the prostrate kid's head as hard as he could (to mimic the old school lever-slap and carriage return).
approved Nov 24 2002, submitted Nov 24 2002 by Daniel Buchan