The Law of the Playground
the pupil report of
Stuart Laidler
Search LOTP
I recall one verse;
First Wally called in Dick the Prick,
Who turned up with his hod.
And he was up to all the tricks,
The good-for-nothing sod.
So he went to work with superglue,
Instead of using water.
"Here Dick", said Wally,
"Don't you think you oughta use,
The proper tools to do the job?"
But Richard as his ace,
Had trampled on the tube,
And stuck a shovel to his face.

I also vaguely recall the punk character from the game sounding like Vivian off of the Young Ones on the song. Why do I recall this? Because I once memorised the whole song and sang it to my mum to impress her. It was around this time that I first became aware that my mother hated me, and it wasn't long before she was openly blaming me for the loss of her figure.

I can't help thinking that the first chap's name should read Dick the Brick, what with his hod and all. -Ponky
approved Jun 2 2006, submitted May 31 2006 by Stuart Laidler
Without wishing to seem any more of an anal dweeb than I am, wasn't that snatch of German from an Episode of Blackadder Goes Forth? Far less macho than "some war movie", no?
approved Nov 4 2003, submitted Oct 23 2003 by Stuart Laidler
A less hygenic version of the washing up liquid was Top Decking. Simply drop your bowels into the cistern and voila; the host will be flushing stinky brown water down their toilet for weeks, if not years to come.
approved Oct 23 2003, submitted Oct 23 2003 by Stuart Laidler
Disproportionate retort to a perfectly reasonable statement. For example:

"Hey Andrea, have you got a red pen I can borrow?"
"No, sorry."
"Well then, I hope your firstborn is a cripple."

If anyone from Killy High has since given birth to a crippled child, I accept no responsibility for it.
approved Apr 29 2003, submitted Mar 27 2003 by Stuart Laidler