The Law of the Playground
the pupil report of
Rob McMeekin
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I was the sad child who dilligently worked out the order in which to feed the dragons to beat the puzzle in the fewest number of moves. I still remember it today: Buns, Lollies, Oranges, Chocolate (or BLOC). You may commence the wedgies.
approved Apr 16 2005, submitted Apr 12 2003 by Rob McMeekin
Silent But Deadly, a popular type of fart. Whilst in retrospect volume was never inversely proportional to the actual stench produced, it was generally accepted that the silent ones were the worst, as our elaborate pantomimes after inhalation would attest. Common remarks in the immediate aftermath almost always included, "He who smelt it, dealt it" (q.v.)
Steven Jackson developed quite a penchant for getting good lungfuls of the expelled air, and giving a considered and expert opinion on the quality. We always listened to his judgement.
(The reason this has popped up again seven years on is that the involved party has asked for his friend's name to be changed. We don't think anyone should be passed up for promotion based on their deep, fruity inhalation of other men's farts. But unfortunately we do not live in an ideal world.)
approved Dec 1 2010, submitted Apr 12 2003 by Rob McMeekin
My name's Coco, I'm a monkey like you,
I live on drugs and a little bit of glue,
I have a condom in a little red box,
But I'd rather use it on Samantha Fox (oh yeah!)
approved Apr 29 2003, submitted Apr 12 2003 by Rob McMeekin