The Law of the Playground
all stories about
you know when you finish wanking and eat it?
Search LOTP
One of a range of questions that will generally be followed by a lingering, horrified silence. The questioner will discover that no, no one knew, and that he had, in fact, made a terrible blunder that would haunt him for the rest of his days.
approved Dec 4 2003, submitted Oct 23 2003 by J Tapdancer
A slow, muggy silence followed Tom Fletcher's statement that "If you look through your legs when you're having a shit, you can see the poo coming out of your arse".
We've all thought it. Some will even confess that they've peeked through the gap between the bowl and the toilet seat, if they're pushed. But Tom Fletcher's eagerness to share this discovery implies that he went on to watch poos slide out of a great many arses.
approved Sep 27 2004, submitted Dec 8 2003 by Charlie Webb
Never convincingly covered up with overtures of an embarrassed "I was only kidding, Jesus" or, even worse, "I only said it to see if anyone else would say yes..."
No you weren't, you ate your wank and everyone now knows it.
approved Jan 19 2004, submitted Jan 2 2004 by Josh G
Tom Clues reveled in the act and even felt extra pride upon realising that no one else did, when he announced it one lunch time.
But then this was hardly a surprising admission from a lad who got his stiffy out in the middle of Plymouth shopping district and tended to "just nip into Debenhams for a wank".
approved Apr 18 2005, submitted Feb 12 2004 by Jason Tapdancer
I know! Lets' get the dog to lick our cocks!
[pause as we tried to work out if he was joking]
Brilliant idea! That'd be amazing! You go first!
[he wasn't joking]
approved Oct 8 2004, submitted Apr 18 2004 by anonymous user
A : Does anyone else get an erection when taking a massive shit?
B thru H, in unison : No.
A : ...me neither.
[pause]
A : Just checking.
[pause]
A : Just making sure no-one got the horn when they did massive shits.
[pause]
A : [laughs] Sickos!

approved Nov 11 2004, submitted Oct 28 2004 by Random Fried
The scenario unfolds as follows:
1) Toilet flushes.
2) My friend exits the toilet, looking puzzled.
3) My friend asks the question 'do you cum when you poo?'
I was unable to say anything. I still am.
approved Apr 12 2005, submitted Dec 27 2004 by Mr. D
tweet it - facebook it -
i've got a story about this