The Law of the Playground
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satanism, junior
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The form of Satanism which consists of nothing more than memorizing the Lord's Prayer backwards and drawing pentagrams on our New English Bibles.
approved Nov 24 2002, submitted Nov 24 2002 by Matt Bright
Also, using a Ouija Board in an attic (spirits being fond of attics), which would always spell out three quarters of a swear word before someone asked who was pushing it.
approved Nov 24 2002, submitted Nov 24 2002 by Jon Blyth
The real way to raise Lucifer from the pit is to have a load of kids all link pinkies in a big circle, close our eyes and chant "Satan come and scratch us". He actually managed to scratch a few people's faces.
Why he didn't just kill us is beyond me. Maybe he's shy.
approved Dec 14 2002, submitted Dec 13 2002 by Andrew Tyers
It was a well known fact that the devil could be summoned by placing a 10p on a grave at midnight and dancing round it ten times. We were too scared to do this, however, and instead tried using a green fruit pastille and dancing round it five times at midday. Nothing happened.
approved May 13 2003, submitted Dec 21 2002 by Alexander Po
Andrew Hubble informed us that he planned to stay awake until midnight and recite the Lord's Prayer backwards in the hopes of conjuring up Beelzebub himself. When he didn't turn up at school the next day we were naturally concerned that Lucifer had stolen poor Andy away, but he'd just overslept, because he'd stayed up past his bedtime on a school night.
approved Sep 25 2003, submitted Sep 17 2003 by Phil Glansvile
Crazed PE teacher Mr Dolby insisted that the simple act of playing Dungeons and Dragons is the first step on the slippery slope to Satanism.
And, Jim, he was right. As this cartoon shows. Thanks - Log.
approved Dec 16 2003, submitted Dec 1 2003 by Jim Taylor
My friend's dad - a vicar - had to pray to see if she was allowed to go to a Hallowe'en party.
He also prayed to see if she could have a hamster.
approved Jan 19 2004, submitted Dec 22 2003 by Name Withheld
We'd heard from some older kids (who had been taught these things in the fourth year) that if you waited until midnight, went outside and squeezed an orange over a mirror, you would summon the Devil.
It worked too, if you think that a successful Devil-summoning constists of a pleasant smelling mirror and sticky fingers.
approved Apr 15 2004, submitted Mar 10 2004 by Steve M
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